Thoughts are endless and our minds keep churning out millions of them. It’s amazing when one takes a back seat for just a little while and lets the mind do what it best does, churn out thoughts, and experience the mind and the drama of thoughts as a spectator from a distance. Thoughts jump from recollection of meals you ate for breakfast to faces of strangers you drove by in the morning on your way to work. Flying in from somewhere is also the thought on the next few things you need to get done during the day and suddenly you start wondering what ever happened to that woman teacher who taught you English for your last year at school; the woman with the horn-rimmed glasses. Just then when you are staring at the computer screen and typing out the report long over due from your last tour you start wondering if you had switched off the light on your way over to work from home. Occasionally the ‘what am I doing with my life’ question may pop up and as quickly dissolves away. Dinner plans, bank deposits, movie scene flashbacks and a sudden urge to hum or sing your favorite song are also part of the entourage to arrive in the long train of thoughts. All this is to say that the mind deserves, if not the exclusive title but certainly the equivalent of the most hard-working engine in the humans.
It is the mastery of controlling thoughts that meditation tries to do.
My experience with meditation is limited to experiences on reading articles and writings on meditation. Given that, I have no hold nor control over the thoughts my mind paints. Yet, it’s been difficult. Difficult in finding something to write about. I believe writing takes a lot of imagination as well as many other qualities. It is in imagination and thinking that a writer may find something or someone to write about. I have tried to write because unlike speaking, writing allows and gives me a chance to best word my thoughts (not to say I have been any good at it). These last few days have been uncomfortably quite; I cannot seem to find anything to really write. One moment I am writing like I have it all clear in my head and the next, I am hitting the backspace button and lost about what I was writing.
So I decided since I could not think of anything to write about, I would give writing about ‘not being able to write’ a thought. Maybe I need inspiration or maybe it’s one of those lazy times when you just need an excuse not to think.